"AAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!", an Ant Story

"Once upon a time there was an ant colony. They were industrious, ambitious little bastards, and they made a bed the entire length of a woman's house, and concealed it in leaves. 

 

One day, the woman, tired of seeing the garden hose coiled on the ground, hung a pretty metal hose hanger on the side of the house, and yanked up the hose from under the leaves and dirt.  Little did she know, the ants had made the hose their own: not only was it half-buried in their vast bed, they had extended their colony inside the hose itself, from end to end. When the woman picked up the hose, she showered herself with millions of ants - they were in her shoes, her clothes, even in her hair!  

 

The woman screamed and screamed! She threw the hose away from herself violently, and brushed off all of the ants, thankful that they were NOT the kind that bite. The ants panicked and ran all over her body and face, and all around the hose, inside and out. They must repair the hose colony! 

 

But, unfortunately for the ants, the woman hooked the hose up to the faucet, turned on the water, and blasted those little fuckers to kingdom come. Then she spread poison all over the bed, and went inside the house and showered and showered and showered.

The end".

 

So that was my weekend, how about you guys?  *shudder*  

That was what I posted on Facebook about it yesterday afternoon, just after it happened.  It's 100% true.  I knew there was an ant bed out there somewhere, because they'd been coming into the house by the thousands.  

Yes, thousands: 

(I feel I should point out that I'm not respon-
sible for this wall color, and it's changing soon)

 

This is just ONE short wall in my master bathroom, after not having vacuumed for a couple of days.  Yes, just a couple of days.  There are more on the other side of the bathroom, in the closet, in the master bedroom, and in my roommate's bedroom, which shares the same exterior wall as these other spaces. They're coming in and dying - I see maybe three or four lives ones per week.  This started about three weeks ago. 

I thought maybe it was the weather - it's been wet, so they're not coming in for water.  But it hasn't been wet enough for them to be coming in to get away from the water. It was super cold for about a week, but it's warmed up since, and they're still coming in. I really have no idea what's going on. 

 

What's killing them? Why are they coming indoors to die? WHERE ARE THEY COMING FROM?  

Turns out the answer to that last question was outside where that hose was lying on the ground.  Ugh. As for the other questions, I have NO idea.  

 

Rest assured, that whole area outside has been thoroughly poisoned, and the entire foundation of the house, all the way around, has been dusted with diatomaceous earth to try to keep them from coming in.  I'm not usually big on the "nuke it from orbit" pest control philosophy, but...desperate times, you know? 

 

 

*

So, yes, anyway, I did hang a couple of pretty metal hose hangers.  I also put up some house numbers on the post on the front porch: 

For most of the long holiday weekend, I worked indoors, painting rooms and building shelves.  This coming weekend is another long one for me.  Provided the weather holds (and it's supposed to), this will be the first major gardening weekend I've had since I moved in.  I'm hoping that next week I'll have some pretty cool stuff to show you.  

P.S.:  thankfully, miraculously, none of the ants in question were fire ants, and I didn't get a single bite! 

P.P.S.:  a LOT of ants were harmed in the making of this post

Spring Is Like, Springing. And Stuff.

Not much going on in the garden right now, aside from dead things coming alive, which is pretty much in the awesome category.

(In the creepy category:  watching June bugs crawling their way up to the surface of the soil from eggs buried beneath, like things back from the dead; then watching them dry and harden in the sun and finally take off to look for a mate, knowing they'll last little more than 72 hours).

Chinese Witch Hazel (Loropetalum chinensis) beginning to bloom in my front garden. 

The first Vinca flower, in the hanging baskets on my front porch.  I'm happy to report that these baskets wintered quite
nicely tucked into the very-overgrown front garden, and never once had to come inside. 

There's also a new rose bush in the front garden, but there are no photos, because it just looks like sticks as of yet.  I hope it does well.  It's an "El Toro", which is a soft-red hybrid tea. The packaging says it's got a lovely fragrance; but everything I'm seeing online says it has no fragrance at all.  We'll see.


.

Foggy Friday Fotos

It's been raining like crazy here for a few days now.  It seems every week it rains at least once, this whole year so far.  I know it hasn't been that frequent, but at the moment, it feels like it's been raining forever.

Notice I'm not complaining.  I love rain, and so do my plants.  This time of year the front garden's looking a tad shaggy.  It needs weeding and pruning, and there's a great big hole where that lavender used to be. But I like it all shaggy.  So I snapped some pics with my phone this morning to show you, as well as some shots of the side yards, which I don't believe I've blogged about yet.  Enjoy.

Front garden and porch from the outside

The chives and Loropetalum at the end of the garden are going nuts;
The east side yard lined with Yarrow and Amaryllis (and dead tree branches, lol)

The west side yard - Rosemary and chives at the front; Esperanza by the a/c

A little cobblestone landing in between,  handy to have for mud purposes. 

*

No Groundhogs In Texas

People up north have Punxatawney Phil, that odd-looking round beast who pokes his head up in February to see if it's still too cold to go outside, or if the sun is finally out.

'Round these parts we hide on our screened porches and our fan-cooled solars, sipping iced tea, and long about this part of the year, one of us walks out to the yard for a sec, to see if it's still 105º goldurned degrees out.

Okay, so, maybe it's not quite that romanticized.  In fact, August is basically "Fuck Texas Month," at least for everyone I know.  You can forget trying to get anything done in the yard, for damn sure.  But now that it's September, and temperatures are finally only in the upper nineties, life resumes:

The front garden lives! Yay!  -1 lavender

Look, I got plants for the baskets on the front porch, finally!!   (variegated Lilyturf
(Liriope), and some Vincas to trail downwards; both on clearance for $1/plant) 

Love!  I hope I remember to water them this time.  I'm
horrible with these baskets. 

Experiment: two tall silver florist's buckets as cachepots - love it, but not
HERE.  I ended up moving them in front of the garage, at opposite sides.
The Sansivierras came from a $5, 3-gallon "plant" which actually held like
seven or eight individual plants.  So I split them up into these two buckets,
a pot on the front porch, and a pot for the house.  

One of the other Sans, along with my Jade Plant,
and an extra Lilyturf that I forgot to plant. 

Over the weekend I also mowed the grass, trimmed back a huge rosemary bush, and trimmed up all of my trees to get rid of suckers and low-hanging branches, including the oak in the front yard.  Pics of that, and stuff in the backyard, later this week.  :)


.

BRB

I'm heading out for a camping vacation for a week in Mississippi; but first, I wanted to share some pics from my front porch and garden before I go:

The rose in the front garden is getting leafy again.
So are the weeds, but, I'll deal with that when I get back. 

A gardening friend bought me this lovely Bougainvillea yesterday!  

I've moved the buckets from the front door, since the one on the right was getting in the way of the storm door opening
properly.  The Begonias are loving it here, but the ferns...um, apparently not.  Different watering/sunlight needs.
Meanwhile, there's a strawberry still in its nursery pot; and a Fernleaf Lavender that is just taking OFF.  (It's in a real
pot, and you can't even see it, it's grown so fast!) 

Wishing you all lots of green leaves until I get back.  :)


.

One Small Step For A Front Porch

There's a lot new going on at home, folks, so this one will be quick and dirty (pardon the pun).

Once Upon A Time: 

Every year, actually with new plants.  This was 2010, with Hostas and Purple Heart. 

Before: 

Empty containers. 

After:  

Begonias and ferns in the silver planters; plus a Fernleaf Lavender
and a strawberry I haven't planted in the front bed yet. :) 

.